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The Sith Lord and the Scientist Section E - Part 4

DAY 33

I press a light kiss against my wife’s temple and slip out of bed, taking care not to wake her. The only place I can escape to for privacy is the ‘fresher, so I do so, seating myself on the edge of the bath and closing the door behind me. Turning the lights on with a gesture, I resist slamming a fist into the wall, which would make far too much noise, and instead chose to study the gold ring on my left hand while I bring my emotions under control.

This is the second time since departing from Coruscant that I have found myself caught in a nightmare, only to wake enraged and with no memory of the precise details. Focus, I chastise myself. You know this is not something related to your future. Maia’s hidden memories in no way resemble what you just dreamt. If they did, you would remember it. No, this is not a premonition, but an expression of the stress I am under, my subconscious mind letting my anxieties run wild while I sleep.

The ‘fresher door opens, revealing my wife, a worried look on her face. My absence from her side has roused her.

‘Anakin?’ she calls to me.

‘I’m fine,’ I tell her. ‘I just needed to be alone for a moment.’

I beckon her over to me, and pat the spot beside me on the bath to encourage her to sit down. This is a strange place to have a late night talk, but I don’t feel like returning to the bedroom yet. Once she is next to me, I wrap my arm around her back and rest my other hand on her middle, noting that the pain she has endured, and I have felt from her for the past day, is finally gone.

‘According to Leanan, he’s securely settled in at last,’ she reassures me. ‘No more cramps or pain.’

I move my hand to under her chin and tip it up so I can look at her. There are no signs of fatigue, nor obvious evidence of her pregnancy to be seen. She appears to be healthy and rested, but even so, I will need to be mindful of what I do with her. Far too much is at stake to take any foolish risks in her training. Gently, lightly, I kiss her, waiting for her to invite me to do more by opening her mouth to me. What begins as a chaste kiss soon becomes deep and passionate. When her fingers start to pull my robe down from my shoulders, I lean back and stop her by setting my hands over hers.

‘Not for a few more days, my love,’ I remind her of what the doctor had suggested. ‘We need to be careful with you.’

She starts a protest which I silence with another quick kiss.

‘In three days I will do whatever you want me to,’ I offer to entice her co-operation. ‘The entire day will be yours to arrange for us as you please.’

‘You will do anything?’ she asks.

‘Within reason,’ I qualify. ‘The Command Deck and other public places are off limits for anything which might cause us trouble.’

My wife looks thoughtful at that. While she might want me to make love to her for hours on end, neither of us is really able to run that sort of marathon for the entire day. Instead, she will ask me to dance with her somewhere there is the space for that, have a proper private dinner with only the two of us, and spend time with her doing other things.

‘Done,’ she quietly agrees. ‘I accept your terms.’ 

I raise her hand to my lips and kiss the back of it.

‘Let’s go see how much sleep we can manage to get before morning,’ I suggest.

There are no objections when I lift her in my arms and carry her back to our bed.

The Executor, Hyperspace Transfer Point, Kinyen System

DAY 35

I pace back and forth, listening to Thrawn’s report and occasionally looking at his hologram while I debate what I should do about everything he has told me.

‘Zaarin has escaped, yet again,’ I note.

‘I doubt he was even present during the ambush,’ the Grand Admiral states. ‘After his first thwarted attempt to kidnap the Emperor, he has no pressing reason to risk himself personally.’

‘And Stele was able to drive off the Ram and destroy the two gunboats,’ I repeat what he told me earlier.

‘Gunboats from the Emperor’s own reserve forces,’ he confirms. ‘Zaarin’s influence is deeper than expected.’

‘Zaarin has gone to ground in the Outer Rim and will have to be lured out from hiding,’ I decide. ‘Once he is removed, his followers will be easier to contain and eliminate. Suitable bait will need to be laid and a trap set.’

‘A trap I am currently working on,’ he assures me.

‘One which must succeed,’ I say in response. ‘I grow weary of this traitor Admiral being an annoying stone in my boot.’

I pause, consider the future, and make a decision. Thrawn is no fool. He could refuse to do what I will ask of him or choose to ignore a call for aid at the time it is sent, but unlike many of his peers, he places honour and integrity ahead of personal political gain. The Grand Admiral will be there when I need him.

‘My master has returned safely to Imperial Center and will depart tomorrow, with the Excalibur, before transferring to the Eclipse for the journey to Endor,’ I tell him. ‘Stele will lead the escort. See to it that he has whatever support he needs, but I want you to stay in the Moddell Sector, no farther than two hours travel by hyperspace from the battlestation. When I have need of your fleet at Endor, I will send you a private signal and expect you to respond immediately.’

‘You anticipate a Rebel attack,’ he shrewdly surmises.

‘They are gathering their ships and will throw all of their remaining forces into destroying the station sometime in the next few weeks,’ I reveal. ‘I want to ensure they are crushed completely, and left with no means of escape. Your fleet added to my own should be sufficient for the task, and the Rebels will not anticipate your presence there.’

‘It will be as you wish, my Lord,’ Thrawn agrees.

I cease my pacing and look at him. Our last conversation was after my son’s death, when Thrawn delivered his condolences. We have other important matters to discuss, but this is not the time for that.

‘After the Rebels are defeated,’ I tell him, ‘we need to speak at length, in person and in private.’

He tips his head in acknowledgement. No more has to be said. The Admiral is fully aware that certain topics can only be dealt with face to face.

‘Until our next meeting’ Admiral,’ I dismiss him.

‘Until then, my Lord,’ he responds.

I cut the transmission. There are others I must contact before the Executor jumps to hyperspace.

***

I stare at the box in front of me before letting my eyes wander around Ani’s workshop. He’s left me alone in it while he is busy with meetings over the Holonet, and he knows that I won’t touch anything without his permission. This is the first time I have been in here, and there is not as much to see as I had expected. The Sith Lord keeps everything tidy, in order, and put away when he isn’t working with it. There is no clutter to be found anywhere. Now I understand why he was so grumpy when he had to use the messy workshop at the observatory. My husband is a bit of a neat freak.

With a sigh, I consider what he had told me. Jedi children were taken to Ilum to go find a kyber crystal for their first lightsaber. The one they selected would be attuned to them, its colour a reflection of their attitude and aptitude. Since I can’t go there, Ani has decided to let me pick mine from one of the crystals he had collected years ago. Hopefully he doesn’t expect me to build my own lightsaber. With my luck, it probably wouldn’t work properly.

I lift the lid from the box but don’t look in it. Instead, I reach inside and run my fingers over the minerals’ natural facets. The edges are not sharp enough to cut my hand and the crystals feel smooth on their planar surfaces. None of them ‘call’ to me in the way Ani had described, so I put the box back on the workbench.

Well, Maia, I tell myself after a few minutes, you need to take a crystal, any crystal, just to make him happy.

Randomly grabbing one, I hold it cupped in my hands and look at it. Colourless, silvery-grey, and unremarkable in appearance is my first impression. As a mineral, without knowing its special properties, it is about as interesting as quartz. When nothing changes after twenty minutes, I return the crystal to the box and take another one.

Three hours later, I have gone through the same process with every crystal in the box without any success.

‘Well, rats,’ I say aloud.

I slide off the elevated chair and go to leave. There’s no point in staying in the workshop if I don’t have anything to do, but the door refuses to open for me. Repeatedly pushing at the controls has no effect, and Ani’s override code doesn’t work. He wouldn’t lock me in here and not say anything to me about it, would he? My husband knows that if I am trapped in a small room I will become claustrophobic, so what is he playing at?

My hands start to shake a little. I tuck them into my armpits to keep them still and pace back and forth for a few minutes in an effort to calm down. Be logical, I scold myself, think it through. Your husband is in the room right next door and he won’t let anything happen to you. Instead of giving in to your fear, panicking, and having a hysterical fit, just ask him to come and let you out.

Anakin? I call to him. I need you to open the door. It’s stuck and I want out. None of your crystals liked me.

The door opens immediately. He must have been standing there, waiting for me to ask for his help. I hold my hand out to him and he takes it.

‘You faced your fear, didn’t panic, and remained calm,’ he tells me, sounding rather pleased, ‘and you also kept trying with the fake crystals and didn’t give in to frustration.’

This was yet another test from him.

He pulls me back into the workshop and opens a compartment in the wall, retrieving a small storage container from inside before closing it again.

‘Try these,’ he offers, handing this second box to me.

‘More fakes?’ I ask, a bit suspicious he might play another trick on me.

‘No, the real ones this time,’ he admits. ‘You passed the equivalent of the tests of fear and perseverance that younglings would go through in the Crystal Caves, so have earned the right to select your own kyber crystal.’

Curious now, I examine what he has given to me. Inside the box, lying on a dark fabric, are four clear, pale blue, slightly glowing crystals. The one on the right draws my eyes to it, so I pick it up.

‘This one,’ I decide, although I am not sure why I prefer it.

‘Go and meditate for a while, using it as your focus,’ Ani tells me. ‘If your choice is the correct one for you, the colour will change.’

‘You just want me out of the way so you can work,’ I tease him.

‘Perhaps,’ he says to me, amused by my accusation.

As I go to leave, to follow his instructions, the Sith Lord grabs my elbow and turns me about, catching me in his arms. I don’t resist him and set my cheek against his chest, my crystal held tight in my hand pinned between us.

‘I am most curious to see what colour your crystal will be,’ Ani tells me.

‘Oh?’ I prod him.

‘For a Sith, red; for most Jedi, green or blue,’ he reveals, ‘but you are unique, a special case, so we shall see.’

‘It will be pink with purple dots,’ I suggest, feeling a bit bratty, ‘or an icky brown colour.’

‘You have two hours before lunch to find out,’ my husband warns me. ‘I will have my meal with you and the children.’

His grasp on me loosens and a hand brushes through my hair before he traces my cheekbone with a finger.

‘Stubborn Jedi wife,’ he calls me.

‘Cranky Sith Lord husband,’ I respond in kind.

‘Go, see to your task, so I can finish my last Holonet call,’ he orders. ‘Lunchtime will arrive soon enough.’

***

She’s settled cross-legged on the bed, crystal in hand, eyes closed, and a thousand light years away from here in thought. I step closer, careful not to disturb her meditation. The mineral resting on her palm has changed, shifting in colour from clear and icy blue to a deep, jewel-like amethyst.

That’s most peculiar, I decide, given that I expected it to be an intense blue due to her expertise with a blade. Few Jedi had a purple lightsaber and most of those… I stop my thought dead and reconsider. Sith blades are red, and red and blue combined yield purple. Over our Force bond, despite all the blocks I placed in her mind to prevent it, my darkness has seeped through enough to influence this, changing what should have been a blue crystal into a purple one.

Moving as quietly as I can, I return to my workshop, select one of the untuned kyber crystals for myself and retrace my steps back to the bedroom. An experiment is in order here. With a great deal of care, ensuring I don’t break her concentration, I join my wife on the bed, facing her and mirroring her pose. Slipping into my own meditation, I center my focus on the gemstone in my hand.

An hour later, I sense a shift in the Force and feel my wife move in front of me.

‘It’s purple?’ she says aloud, obviously perplexed by what she sees.

I open my eyes, to find her closely examining her crystal. The one I had chosen for myself is more reddish than hers, but it is definitely purple in hue and not a true crimson. Reaching over, I set it in her hand, beside her own.

‘So is mine,’ I tell her.

‘But why?’ my wife asks. ‘I thought yours was supposed to be red and mine green or blue.’

‘An unexpected, and harmless, side effect of the Sith Force bonding ceremony,’ I admit. ‘Our souls are so strongly bound together, now, that my Force presence in your mind has influenced what should have been a blue crystal for you, and yours in my mind has done the same with my red one.’

‘Red plus blue equals purple,’ she confirms, starting to laugh. ‘Somehow I don’t think a purple lightsaber will suit you.’

‘I have several red kyber crystals in reserve,’ I state. ‘No need for a purple blade, for a while, at least. You, however, will start building your own ‘saber this afternoon while I work on a spare one for myself.’

‘I like the one you made for me,’ she protests. ‘I don’t need a new one.’

‘You still need to learn how to build and repair your own,’ I remind her. ‘There might be a time when you will have no choice and without those skills could end up in trouble.’

I can sense her debating whether or not to argue with me about this, but I don’t give her a chance to say anything. Brushing a finger across her lips, I take the two purple kyber crystals from her hand.

‘I will put these in the workshop and lay out the parts and tools we will require this afternoon,’ I tell her. ‘While I do that, could you see to lunch? If you are quick, I will make an iced dessert for you.’

***

I let my husband go rather than try keeping him with me for a few more minutes. If he is willing to make my favourite sweet and spend the afternoon alone in his workshop with me, then I won’t complain. Learning how to build a lightsaber should be interesting, even if I still don’t see the point of it, and Ani will watch what I do so I don’t make any mistakes.

While I organize lunch in the kitchen, I sneak peeks at what the Sith Lord is busy with in his workshop through the door he has left open. I recognize some of what he is setting out, like the small powercells and a few of the tools, but most of it is unfamiliar to me. When the autochef finishes, I return my attention to it and our meal. It will be a simple nuna soup today for the children and me, but Ani will need his supplement drink, too. I grab his glass and the container of that from the cooling unit and take both into the bedroom, putting them on the table with everything else.

My husband is programming the autochef as I make another trip to the kitchen. His back is to me, so I slide my arms around his waist from behind and lay my cheek between his shoulder blades.

***

I rest a hand over hers and feel the heat from her body against mine. It will be a few minutes before the children are here so there is time to indulge her in this.

‘You just want to be held,’ I observe, turning around in her embrace.

‘Yes, dear,’ she confirms.

Her mind is calm and peaceful, and our bond resonates between us with the quiet aftermath of both our meditations. She leans on my chest and I hold her close, allowing myself, in this moment, to simply be a man who loves his wife.

‘I love you, Anakin,’ she tells me.

She doesn’t need to say it because I can feel it from her, and she knows that I love her in return, even though I am a Sith Lord, despite that emotion being forbidden to me. I pull her tighter to myself as one reason why it is prohibited occurs to me. Fear, anger, and hatred, all are permitted for a Sith, but none of those are the most dangerous of emotions: love is.

‘Little goddess, beloved wife, mother of my children,’ I say to the woman in my arms. ‘Know that I would do anything for you, Maia, anything at all, to keep you and our sons and daughters safe from harm.’

My master is a fool to so easily forget what was most important to me years ago, and is even more so to me now.

Love drove the Jedi I was to destroy everything he once had valued; it will force a Sith Lord to make similar choices.

***

He’s in one of his contemplative moods, I decide, when Ani lets me snuggle up to him and turns about to hold me.

‘You just want to be held,’ he tells me.

‘Yes, dear,’ I tease him, confirming his suspicions.

Hopefully he will let me stay for a while. I need the physical contact and reassurance from him, and I can feel his love for me over our bond.

‘I love you, Anakin,’ I remind him.

His response is to hold me tighter.

‘Little goddess, beloved wife, mother of my children,’ he calls me then promises, ‘Know that I would do anything for you, Maia, anything at all, to keep you and our sons and daughters safe from harm.’

‘I know you will, Anakin,’ I quietly say. ‘You have always done that.’

A sigh overrides his regulated breathing and I feel his fingers on my cheek.

‘I failed you on Hapes by placing politics ahead of ensuring your safety,’ he admits.

‘Please, Ani, don’t blame yourself for that,’ I ask of him. ‘There was no way you could have known what would happen.’

Not once have I held him responsible for my being attacked, not on Hapes and not afterwards. With all of my security and the Queen Mother’s guards, no one should have been able to come close enough to me, no one except… I freeze in his arms as a fragment of memory returns.

‘What is it?’ Ani asks.

He has felt my reaction to what has come back to me.

‘One of the Chume’doro stunned me,’ I reveal, feeling a bit shaky as I say it. ‘I just remembered that.’

Ani brings his left hand up, rests it against my cheek and then caresses my face with it. He has chosen to keep me calm rather than dig for more details. Mikal’s voice reaches us from the hallway outside his quarters.

‘We should discuss that later,’ he decides. ‘It will have to wait because the children have just arrived.’

***

I send Mikal into his room for a change of clothes and to play for a while with his sisters. He’s become a little too observant and has a tendency to blurt things out to whoever is at hand who might listen to him.

‘That can wait a moment,’ I tell my wife, taking the glass from her hand and replacing it on the table she was tidying.

‘I know what you want,’ she teases me.

‘Do you now?’ I tease in return.

‘Anakin,’ she reminds me. ‘There’s not much you can hide from me emotionally, especially when it is centered directly on me.’

I catch her hand and kiss her palm. She shivers in response, so I move my lips to her wrist then her mouth. Pulling back for a moment, I brush a finger across her lips. Maia’s mouth is sweet, as it always is after a meal, and I suspect she does that on purpose, knowing that I enjoy kissing her as a means for tasting the foods I can no longer easily eat.

‘Kiss me, Ani,’ she tells me.

I obey, feeling her relax against my body. Our tongues meet, duel, before she yields to me completely. She wants me, right now, but won’t ask for that, remembering the bargain I had struck with her for tomorrow. I, on the other hand, made no such deal with her, so I let myself react naturally rather than curb it. My wife can sense my emotional and physical responses, but does not know what I plan to do about them.

‘Maia,’ I admit, breaking off our kiss. ‘I want you.’

‘In the ‘fresher,’ she suggests. ‘If we are quick…’

‘...we won’t get caught,’ I finish with a laugh.

I pull her by the hand into the room in question and securely lock the door. As soon as I turn to face her, Maia is comfortably seated, her hands rapidly and deftly removing my belt and codpiece. Rather than tell her what I want, I will let her do as she pleases to me.

First, her fingers run along me. Light touches, gentle strokes, caresses designed to tease but never fulfil, holding me caught on that edge between pain and pleasure, between need and release, and driving me backwards into the door in an attempt to escape from this version of torture she is subjecting me to. When she replaces her hand with her mouth and repeats what she just did to me, denying me what I desperately want, I slam my head backwards, painfully, into the durasteel door.

‘Not fair!’ I protest in a strangled voice when her teasing tongue leaves me unfulfilled and teetering on the brink for a third time.

Her mouth next engulfs me entirely and there is nothing I can do to hold myself back. My hands grab her shoulders as my back arches and moans of pleasure escape from me. She’s thoroughly enjoying this, I note, torturing me, finally letting me orgasm, and sharing everything I feel over our bond, All too soon it is over and she is coughing, gagging a bit on what she just swallowed.

I look down, to see her sitting on the floor in front of me, eyes downcast and shoulders shaking. She still finds it difficult at times to do this for me, so something must have upset her. Unsure what the problem is, I kneel, and tip her face up with my fingers only to discover that instead of crying, she is trying her best not to lose control. When I kiss her cheek, she dissolves into laughter. My wife obviously finds what she just did to me highly amusing.

‘That was very well done, little goddess,’ I compliment her. ‘I enjoyed everything you did, even when you were tormenting me, but you can always spit it out. I don’t expect you to swallow it.’

‘I was curious to see if it was different,’ she admits, ‘but it’s the same as before, no change.’

‘Very little of it has changed because only the fertile part is absent,’ I explain.

I lean over and kiss her forehead. We don’t have much time left.

‘Let’s clean up and go see if the children are ready,’ I suggest. ‘They have been busy playing in their room, but soon will be bored of that and come looking for us.’

I help her to her feet, waiting until she is out of my way before standing up myself. Everything we need is in here, so I fill the basin with warm water and retrieve several towels. Maia is digging through one of the compartments, looking for something to rinse her mouth with. While she searches for that, I wash myself, turning away once I am finished, giving my wife some privacy to see to her own needs.

‘Anakin,’ she calls once she is done.

I secure my belt at my waist and move to face her. She wants to be held some more, so I indulge her in that, as I did earlier in the kitchen, only this time there is nothing to stop me from kissing her.

‘One last kiss for you then we must go,’ I warn her. ‘I need to put on my helmet and I want you to change into something you can duel in.’

She prolongs that kiss as long as she can, but I don’t have it in me to stop her.

***

I check the diagram in front of me yet again and line up the components on the workbench to match it. Ani has long since put his new lightsaber together and already turned it on. He had used his purple kyber crystal, just to see what colour the blade would be, but is now replacing it with a red one.

‘I liked the purple one,’ I tease him. ‘It looked pretty.’

‘Red is better suited to a Sith,’ he reminds me.

Feeling a bit bratty, I make a face at him.

‘The longer it takes you to finish yours,’ he warns me, ‘the less duelling time you will have with me.’

As I watch, the purple crystal floats out of his ‘saber, and the red one goes into its place, both of them moved by the Force. While the Sith Lord fusses a bit with the crystal’s exact positioning, I decide that I had better take his advice and stop procrastinating.

Cylinder and grips, first, since those are simplest. I pick up the durasteel sleeve and start adding the black grips to it, around the base. The form I prefer can be done with one hand, so my ‘saber will be designed to accommodate that. Next, the activator switch and blade controls.  Those tasks done, I turn my attention to the ‘guts’ of the ‘saber, the emitter and internal components which need to be lined up and connected. These I take my time with. Making a mistake could cause big problems.

‘Reverse that,’ Ani tells me. ‘The polarity is in the wrong direction.’

I look at him, puzzled. Rather than describe in detail what I need to fix, he picks up the conductor in question and rotates it.

‘Everything else is correct,’ he confirms, after examining my work. ‘You can place your crystal now.’

The Sith Lord goes back to his own task, sliding the innards of his new lightsaber back into the hilt and reconnecting the powercell. He might appear to be busy with that, but I know he is keeping an eagle eye on what I am doing, too.

I do my best to ignore my husband and concentrate on lifting my purple kyber crystal into the air and over to what I have built. Once it ‘feels’ right, I am supposed to use the Force to close the prongs, which will hold it in place, over the facets of the gem. Unlike my frustrating and futile attempts at tutaminis, manipulating small objects with telekinesis comes easily to me. When I have the crystal exactly where it needs to be, I know instantly and quickly anchor it in place.

‘That was nicely done,’ my husband praises. ‘Go ahead and finish it.’

A few minutes later, my lightsaber is ready and a new powercell in it. I hesitate, waiting for Ani to turn his on first. He humours me and does exactly that, his new red blade being a close copy of his old one. With a bit of caution, I hold my hand out, new ‘saber in it, and push the activator switch. The blade which emerges is a pale purple, more blue than red in hue, and quite different from the shade Ani’s was. I turn it off and carefully set it on the workbench. Hopefully he is happy with it because I still prefer the one he gave me.

***

She’s trembling a little after I send her lightsaber flying across the salle for a sixth time. I turn my own blade off, step closer to her and let her fall into my arms, while I sort out what to do next. Rather than pull my attacks or duel with caution, I have worked at full speed, forcing Maia to use every defensive tactic I have taught her. For a while she was able to keep up, but eventually, inevitably, I broke through and disarmed her. Ten minutes is the longest she has been able to keep me at bay, better than almost all the Jedi and Sith I have killed, but of them, only Dooku was a true second form master like she is.

‘You can’t match me by using pure Makashi or Soresu,’ I tell her. ‘My modified Djem So and superior physical strength will beat through that every time.’

Her breathing and heart rate finally begin to slow, but she doesn’t move her head from where it is resting on my chest. After hooking my ‘saber on my belt, I brush her hair with my fingers to settle her. She’s had enough of duelling with me for one day so I let her stay where she is, using my body as a support. I have pushed her relentlessly and the last of our duels was almost too much for her.

‘We need to hybridize your style, as I have done with mine,’ I decide. ‘I will pick what will work for you from Shien, Djem So, and Niman and incorporate that into what you already have. I know you have trained in the use of two blades, so we will start there. It’s been years for me, so working out with that form will be good for both of us.’

‘Yes, my Lord,’ she dutifully replies.

‘Don’t be angry with me, my love,’ I tell her, continuing to run my fingers through her hair. ‘I had to test you under battle conditions - I needed to know how you would fare against me if I went after you at full speed and power. If you can handle that from me, you can defend yourself from all but one living duellist I know of, and he would have to come directly through me, first, to get to you.’

She doesn’t reply, not at first, and not in words. Instead, what I feel from her is uncertainty and a touch of fear - uncertainty for our future and fear of what might happen to her if I am killed in battle.

‘Nothing is ever certain when it comes to the future,’ I remind her.

I ease us both to the floor, and wait for my wife to shift herself about so we are facing one another and comfortable in how we are sitting. Reaching for where our bond is anchored in my mind, I touch it lightly, sending how I feel for her through it, and watching for a reaction from my wife. She closes her eyes and copies what I just dd.

‘So, bound we two are - in mind, in soul, in the Force,’ I state the facts. ‘Now, remember what happened with your brother, on your homeworld, when he died and your bond with him was broken.’

‘It hurt,’ she admits. ‘I collapsed.’

‘And you survived it,’ I tell her. ‘Here, there would have been the shock of his death over it, but no broken bond.’

‘I don’t understand,’ she admits.

‘Here, he is a Jedi,’ I remind her. ‘He is connected not only to the Force but also to you, and would hang about, as a Jedi ghost, being a nuisance, much as he does now. Your bond would continue, undamaged, until you joined him in death when you both would merge with the Force.’

She blinks, staring at me.

‘If you don’t believe me,’ I suggest, ‘ask him yourself.’

I know her brother is hanging about because I had asked him to evaluate our duelling as an unbiased observer.

‘Don’t bother asking. Your Sith Lord husband is correct,’ Michael confirms what I have said as he appears, wearing a set of Jedi robes, and sits down with us. ‘If two Jedi are life-bonded and one dies, they can stick around as a Force ghost, bound to their living sibling or mate.’ Staring straight at me, he criticizes, ‘You need to work on having more flexibility in your shoulders, and some of your attacks were sloppy.’ He looks at his sister and scolds, ’Stop trying a parry prime and riposte against him. You can’t move fast enough for that to work effectively, and he disarmed you twice when you did that.’

‘Jedi pest,’ I growl a warning at him. ‘Leave her be for a while. You can deliver a critique of our duels later.’

‘So, brother-in-law the Sith,’ he prods, heeding my words, ‘she needs to know the rest.’

I ignore him and reach over to take Maia’s hand. What I will tell her will both upset and comfort her.

‘You are worried about what will happen to you if I am killed,’ I start, but Maia interrupts me.

‘A Jedi can stay with their life-bonded sibling or mate,’ she repeats. ‘You have told me before that I would stay with you, as a Jedi ghost, if something happened to me.’

She touches the cheek of my mask with a finger.

‘Are you still truly a Sith?’ my wife muses aloud. ‘Our Force bond and that purple kyber crystal…’

I don’t move or utter a word. On that night when we role played, with us seemingly on her homeworld and away from the Empire, I chose to publically reclaim and use my old name, and admitted to myself the truth of what had changed within me. Now, she can fully feel it, sense it, through all my shields, and she has always known who I really am in my heart, despite my public ‘evil Sith Lord’ act.

Her mouth forms a surprised ‘oh’ she doesn’t say aloud.

‘You would stay with me,’ she whispers. ‘You would be a Jedi ghost attached to me like Michael is.’

‘Sith ghost,’ I gently correct her, before setting my hand over our son and revealing, ‘The shock if I were to be killed would traumatize you rather badly, and to survive that you would need to resist and fight against being drawn into death with me. It will not be easy for you to do that, but if you succeed, if you choose to live, to remain behind to protect and raise our children, all of our bonds would remain intact. On your death, we would still be bound together, Jedi and Sith, but would stay on Korriban as ghosts rather than merge with the Force, as two Jedi would. Unfortunately, your brother would be joining us there as well, since he is permanently bound to you.’

Happy, now, pest? I growl, telepathically, at her brother. She knows everything about it that I do.

***

I ignore my brother and stare at my husband. He has always told me we would both die when he did, so when he reveals that I have a choice, that I could fight to stay alive, it is quite a shock. Perhaps he expects that I will want to go with him rather than live out my life alone, unable to really touch him even if he can be with me, in a way. Lifting his hand in mine, I hold it close to my heart and squeeze it lightly, to reassure him that I am not as upset by what he has said as he might think.

‘You expect that I will want to stay behind when Luke kills you,’ I tell him. ‘You know I won’t abandon our children.’

There is an uncomfortable, if slight, shift of position from him, and an open mouth from Michael.

‘He won’t kill me,’ Ani firmly states.

My brother gives me one of his annoyed looks.

‘Luke won’t kill him, Maia,’ Michael says. ‘You have that part wrong. It’s...’

‘...not for her to worry about at the moment, pest,’ my husband shuts him up. ‘And if you are going to hang about and be a critic of my technique, then I expect you to spend some of your time being a duelling partner for me since I won’t need to hold anything back against you.’

I start an objection to them duelling then change my mind and say nothing. These two will do as they please regardless of anything I might say to try stopping them. The Sith Lord can’t harm my brother, but Michael could do my husband some damage. Hopefully common sense will prevail and neither of them will end up in trouble. A gloved finger traces my cheekbone, to stop on my lips. After he stands, his hands take mine as he helps me to my feet. Ani calls my ‘saber to his hand from where it had landed and returns it to me.

‘We will use the training ‘sabers,’ he decides, having picked up on my unspoken concerns. ‘I want my wife to go back to my quarters and rest.’

Watching the two of them duel would be interesting and educational, but I choose to do as Ani wishes. I am tired and need a bath, and he obviously wants to discuss something in private with Michael. We can talk about him being a Sith ghost later.

‘Don’t be too long,’ I remind him. ‘The children will expect you at dinnertime.’

***

I cup her face with my hands and set a thumb across her lips.

‘Go and rest,’ I firmly repeat my order to her as I release her.

This time she doesn’t reply and steps out of the salle. Thirsk will see her safely to my quarters from here. I don’t need to worry about that.

‘So, Jedi,’ I turn to face her brother. ‘We have quite a few things to discuss.’

‘You know,’ he states flatly.

‘Yes, I do,’ I admit. ‘Her memories, and I am certain that they are memories and not future visions, are quite specific about the circumstances.’

He shifts uneasily from one foot to the other, looking a bit like his namesake, my son, does when I catch him in the midst of some mischief.

‘You have always known what was to happen at Endor, what my future would be, so don’t bother pretending otherwise,’ I snap at him. ‘What I don’t understand is why you have said nothing when you could have spared your sister much pain and grief.’

I feel him gathering himself, preparing to pull one of his convenient vanishing acts.

‘Go ahead, run away,’ I taunt him. ‘If you don’t have the courage to face me, then you certainly won’t be able to deal with your sister after she realizes the truth, that you could have warned me against going to Hapes but stayed silent and let her and our son suffer instead.’

‘I didn’t know that you weren’t supposed to go to Hapes,’ he angrily protests. ‘When I said I could tell you nothing about the Hapans which would be of help to you, I was being completely honest. Maia knew the details of your personal history far better than I do.’

Knew, I think to myself. She knew my past and future, and chose to conceal most of her knowledge. In hindsight, I can understand why. Had I been able to extract even a small part of what she knew from her during that first week on the Executor, the past few years would have been quite different, and not in a positive way. Despite our life-bond, despite my love for her, I would have questioned her mercilessly, repeatedly, in an attempt to gain every advantage I could, and she would never have survived that type of treatment at the hands of the Sith I was then.

‘She was wise to hide what she knew,’ I admit, ‘but that doesn’t help us much, now.’

I go to a storage compartment and remove the training ‘sabers from it. With a flick of my wrist, I toss one of them at Michael. While I can’t cause any damage to him, there is no reason to risk him harming me. He catches the ‘saber, activates it, and gives it a few experimental swings.

‘If you want a practice run, I have a good idea what Luke will do,’ he offers.

‘I am not worried about Luke,’ I reply, amused by his assumption. ‘My son cannot best me in a duel unless I allow him to.’

Michael’s eyes narrow. He’s figured out what I am up to, at least in part, or thinks he has.

‘You intend to take on your boss,’ he decides, ‘and drag Luke and my sister into it, too.’

I don’t bother answering him and instead turn on the training ‘saber in my hand. Let him speculate and worry a little bit. It will serve as a distraction to him and give an advantage to me.

‘Guard yourself, Jedi,’ I warn him.

Then, I attack him.

***

My husband is a bit subdued when he finally returns to his quarters. I hope he didn’t overdo it in duelling with my brother. Michael doesn’t need to worry about taking rests or being injured, but Ani does.

‘Daddy!’ Mikal cries on seeing his father, leaving his toy ‘troopers and miniature Sith Lord abandoned on the floor as he launches himself at Ani.

‘Hello, son,’ Ani greets him. ‘What have you been up to?’

I watch father pick up son and don’t bother hiding my smile. With how busy he has been lately, my husband has had little time to spare for our children. Every minute he can steal from his duties and from training me is precious time for them to be together.

‘’Mi’s bantha ran away and we are searching for her,’ Mikal admits.

‘He’s had ‘you’ and your ‘troopers go through your office a few times,’ I reveal.

‘Would you like me to help?’ Ani offers.

An eager nod is Mikal’s response to that. I watch Ani set him down, take his hand, and go for a walk around the room, stopping whenever there is a potential hiding place to search.

‘No bantha,’ Mikal states after the room has been thoroughly inspected.

‘Perhaps it escaped from here and we need to look somewhere else?’ his father suggests.

Go ahead and take him for a walk, I tell Ani. He needs the time alone with you. I’ll put the toy on the Holonet controls for Mikal to find when you return.

The two of them are soon out the door and off on a lost bantha hunt.

***

She’s definitely up to something, I decide. Breakfast has been made and set aside, stored for the morning in the bedroom so that we can share that as a family. Normally on ship, I have mine, first, then put on my helmet before my wife and children have theirs. On the Executor, unlike my castle on Coruscant, Maia can’t go into the kitchen to prepare their meal until the bedroom is depressurized and the door can be opened.

‘It’s your turn, tonight,’ my wife suggests.

It’s my turn to settle the children for the night, to tuck them in, read a story, chase any monsters away, and kiss them good night. I pick Shmi up and let her tug on my hair, what remains of it after I had it cut short again. Mikal has already climbed into bed and chosen a book from the collection his mother assembled, and Cat is fussing a little and wanting my attention. After setting ‘Mi beside Cat, I brush one of her sister’s curls behind her ear. The twins have my colouring and their maternal grandmother’s hair type.

‘The Lost Bantha Cub?’ I question when I see the story my son has chosen.

Appropriate, given today’s adventure, and a tale we all have memorized.

***

‘They are all settled in and dreaming,’ Ani assures me.

I take his hand and pull him close. Earlier, I had brewed a pot of millaflower tea, and now I am drinking the last cup of it.

‘You must be tired, if you are resorting to that,’ he observes.

‘A little,’ I admit. ‘It helps me relax and fall asleep.’

My husband moves his chair over so he can sit beside me. He’s been quiet ever since he had that talk with Michael, but I know better than to pry. Sooner or later, I will hear all about it from one of them.

‘You remembered something earlier,’ he reminds me.

‘It’s not much,’ I decide, ‘and probably not of any real use to you. One of the Chume’doro stunned me, but with their helmets on, one of them looked to me much like the others did. It could have been one of the guards or someone in disguise.’

‘Were they male or female?’ Ani asks.

I carefully consider what little I remember before answering. The attack was so quick that I was only able to see who had stunned me for a few seconds.

‘Female, I think,’ I say slowly. ‘It happened so fast.’

He reaches over to take my hand. I twist my fingers amoungst his and refuse to let go. When he pulls his hand towards his chest, mine goes with it, so he kisses the back of it before holding both over his heart.

‘You won’t ever lose me, Maia,’ he reassures me. ‘We are permanently stuck with one another.’

‘How long have you known?’ I risk the question.

‘Known you might survive my death? Not for very long. Suspected? More than a year,’ the Sith Lord admits.

A finger on his free hand traces a path across my cheek, stopping under my chin before he lets his hand fall away from my face.

‘I was telling the truth when I said you would have to fight against being pulled into death with me,’ he adds. ‘Few would have the strength of will required to manage that, but you are a particularly stubborn woman with a strong maternal instinct. Our children will need you to stay with them, to protect and to raise them.’

I bite my lip and look away, knowing that he has given me permission to let him go, alone, into death, if it comes to that.

‘It’s not fair, Ani,’ I whisper to him my old lament.

‘Life is never fair,’ he tells me in return, ‘but I do not intend to die any time soon.’

He sets aside my half-finished cup of tea and helps me to my feet. I am tired and he needs to rest, too.

‘Come to bed, now,’ he suggests. ‘Set aside your worries for a while. They can wait for another day, another time.’

***

I am alone with the Queen Mother, discussing something I cannot recall. She approaches me, sets her hands upon my body, caresses and gropes me, yet I find myself paralyzed, powerless to stop her or shove her away. What do you want from me, I try to ask, but without a voice, silenced by her command, I am unable to demand an explanation. An order is given and I am forced to follow her to a door which opens at her touch…

I awake with a startled jolt, thrown out of my dream by a burst of rage. Maia is curled up under my cloak, on her side, facing away from me, and thankfully my nightmare and reaction to it have not disturbed her sleep. Folding back the blankets, I sit up, move to the edge of the bed and cover my face with my hands, before running my fingers through my hair. Something must have happened on Hapes which I have blocked out of my conscious memories. This is what keeps returning in my sleep, growing stronger and clearer each time.

Patience, I decide. With time, that memory will come back to me and I will decide then what I need to do about it. For now, there are too many other pressing things to do and no time to force whatever I had experienced to the surface. It will simply have to wait until later.

‘Anakin?’ a half-awake voice calls to me.

She must have felt me move from her side or sensed my anger, even in her sleep.

‘A bad dream woke me up,’ I confess. ‘It’s nothing for you to worry about.’

I feel her fingers on my back, her touch light and gentle, and her unspoken emotional reassurances soothing my frustrations away, allowing my tense muscles to relax. There are definitely advantages to having an empath for a wife.

‘Let me give you something more pleasant to dream about,’ Maia offers.

I turn about and lie down beside her again. She quickly settles her head on my shoulder, so I pull her in close. After that nightmare, I have no desire for sex, but she needs some attention and physical contact with me. My first kiss is to the top of her head, the second to her forehead as she looks at me, and the third on her lips when she sets hers against mine. I give in to her invitation, roll her over, onto her back, and kiss her repeatedly, deeply and with as much passion as I can muster, but my wife can sense that I more concerned with sleeping than lovemaking. When I pull back to let her breathe between kisses, she sets a finger on my lips and shakes her head.

‘Not now, love,’ she tells me. ‘I know you are not that interested, and I can wait.’

‘We should sleep,’ I suggest. ‘Tomorrow, I am yours for the entire day, as I have already promised you. You can have your way with me all night, and if you wish, until the following morning.’

‘In your armour,’ she teases.

‘However and wherever you want me,’ I agree.

Maia presses her mouth to mine and quickly kisses me.

‘Goodnight, dear,’ she tells me.

I wait for her to turn onto her side then settle her body next to mine, my right arm draped over her waist and left under her head. When we are both comfortable, I kiss the back of her neck.

‘Goodnight, my love,’ I reply in kind.

We are both asleep within minutes.

***

The Executor, Deep Space en route to Endor, Year 4, Month 2

DAY 1

While Ani has his morning shower I set out everyone’s breakfast. For the children and myself, it will be juice, toast, and fruits, and for him, his usual supplement drink. Today is supposed to be mine, and I have been busy working out what we will do. Much of it, I am certain, will be a complete surprise for my husband.

My first task finished, I turn my attention to what to wear. Since we will be moving around and have the children with us, for the morning and afternoon, my practical clothes will be best. Later, I will change into something else. I am almost dressed when Ani emerges from the ‘fresher.

‘So, what have you planned?’ he asks.

I smile and refuse to give him an answer with any details.

‘Breakfast, first,’ I insist, ‘then you will find out.’

‘Stubborn,’ he calls me.

Rather than engage him in our usual exchange, I walk over, slide my arms around his waist, and rest my ear against his chest. With his armour off, and only his robe in the way, it is much easier to listen to his steady heartbeat. His arms pull me close in response and I feel his lips on my hair.

‘Attempting to be unpredictable,’ he observes. ‘Today should be interesting, then.’

‘ ‘Always be unpredictable when engaging a superior opponent’,’  I quote my grandfather. ‘ ‘Draw him in and then attack in a way which will surprise him and give you an edge’. ’

‘Are we to have a duel?’ Ani teases me. ‘You know I will eventually win if we do.’

‘Perhaps,’ I cheekily reply. ‘Maybe I have a different type of contest in mind, with you as the prize.’

I tip my head up and look at him. While Ani is managing to keep himself from laughing, he is failing miserably at stopping himself from smiling.

‘Let yourself be happy, Anakin,’ I tell him. ‘For today, it’s just us and the children who matter.’

***

Let yourself be happy, she had told me before breakfast. Wise advice, I decide, as I watch the children chase after each other, their morning meals abandoned on the table. They should have a father who will be there when they need him, and to not only be strong when necessary, but also laugh and cry with them.

Maia pours herself a cup of stim tea and smiles, her eyes on Mikal and Shmi. They have abandoned their pursuit of their sister and decided to climb up onto my bed, hiding under the covers, and peering out at Cat who is still on the floor. All three are soon laughing as Cat joins them on the bed and crawls in with them. It is a simple and ordinary domestic scene, one many parents experience daily, yet for me it is a revelation. Elsewhere and elsewhen, this could have been my life on a regular basis, rather than the exception.

‘I need to make more time for us as a family,’ I decide, reaching over to squeeze my wife’s hand. ‘Once our lives are more settled, I will.’

‘Our lives will never be settled or predictable,’ Maia tells me. ‘You have your work and that, and what Palpatine requires of you, will always be there.’

I don’t debate her statement or enlighten her as to my plans. My wife has enough to worry about without my adding to it.

‘The future is never set in stone,’ I remind her, ‘and you promised to tell me, after breakfast, what your plans are for the day.’

‘Time with the children, Ani,’ she reveals, ‘lunch with all of us, a quiet afternoon then dinner for two, and an evening doing other things.’

She has given me a framework only, with no details. I laugh a little at her evasiveness. Whatever she is up to will be worth the wait and surprise.

***

‘Run, Mikal,’ I call to my son.

I watch Rik madly chase after my son, but the pilot somehow trips over his own feet before he can beat Mikal back to the empty spot in the circle.

‘Don’t say it,’ Rik tells the rest of us as he pushes himself up from the floor. ‘I know I am the goose, again.’

‘No, you’re ‘it’,’ I remind him. ‘Mikal was the goose and he beat you back to his spot.’

I know Ani is finding this game rather amusing. Nobody has dared to label him the goose and risk losing to him, or worse yet, beating the Sith Lord back to the spot he is sharing with Shmi. The twins are too young to play the game on their own so my husband has ’Mi on his lap while Cat is with me.

‘Perhaps another game might suit Black Two more than this one,’ the Sith Lord suggests.

‘Alright,’ I agree. ‘Let me think of something simple where aim is important, then.’

I rest my chin on my hand and run the various games I played as a child through my mind. We have spent the morning keeping busy with some of those, and thankfully my husband and staff have been willing to go along with what I have come up with.

‘Penny pitching,’ I decide. ‘I will need some small disks and a ring to aim them at. We’ll start four steps back, and with each successful toss, take another step back until only one of us is left.’

You can be the referee, I tell my husband. No one will believe you aren’t using the Force or cheating somehow if you play.

***

I pick up the handled container holding lunch for my wife and children and wait to hear our destination. The Lieutenants, Rik, and Thirsk have already left, sent to have their own meals and afternoons free. Later, they will be back, to keep the children occupied for the evening.

‘Lunch in the observation deck,’ my wife reveals. ‘It’s a small enough area to keep the children contained, but still large enough for them to run about in.’

‘A picnic lunch,’ I tease her.

Mikal takes my free hand and the twins do the same with their mother’s as we head off on our journey. We must make an odd looking group as we move through the corridors, but no one says a word about it.

***

I laugh and try not to let myself become too dizzy as Ani spins me about in his arms. For once he didn’t argue or come up with some excuse to avoid dancing with me. It probably helps that we are alone, in the small salle, and away from anyone’s prying eyes. The Sith Lord, today, has been perfectly content to go along with whatever I have come up with for us to do. When the music finally stops, I rest my head against his chest and take a few deep breaths to steady myself.

‘I should teach you another set of dance steps,’ Ani decides.

‘You are willing to risk being stepped on?’ I tease him.

He might have forgotten how long it took me to learn a waltz and how to avoid his feet, but I haven’t.

‘A minuet is not that dangerous,’ he tells me. ‘You move at my side, and we also dance apart, so you would be at a distance from me, well away from anywhere my feet might be.’

‘Minuets are boring,’ I state. ‘Old, slow, boring.’

‘And the Emperor’s favourite dances,’ he adds to my list.

I make a face at that and hear laughter rumbling in his chest in response. There is no way I want to be put on display at some court function just to please the old coot. As long as I don’t know how to perform the steps, I won’t have to do it.

‘It’s safer to stick to what I can do already,’ I suggest.

‘Safer for my feet,’ Ani confirms.

He raises a hand from my waist to my face, resting it on my cheek for a few seconds before wrapping it around my back and pulling me in close. I know he is indulging my need to have him near me, to be in physical contact with him, and that he is using this opportunity to make me happy.

‘Stay for as long as you need to,’ he offers. ‘There is no reason to rush away.’

On my homeworld he had made the same offer and I had taken him up on it. I wonder what might have happened if I had not. Perhaps nothing would have changed or perhaps everything. Bringing my left hand up to rest in front of my face, I stare at the plain gold ring on my finger, only to have Ani rest his gloved hand on top of it.

‘Little Jedi wife,’ he dubs me. ‘Your mind is going in a thousand different directions, and all of them to do with me.’

‘Just idle daydreams about might have beens,’ I admit.

‘Might have beens,’ he repeats. ‘My love, the past can never be changed.’

I nod my head and close my eyes. He gives my hand a light squeeze. My husband’s focus has almost always been on the future, not paths not taken in the past.

‘Tell me what you are curious about,’ he suggests. ‘Perhaps I can settle your mind on it.’

I take a slow breath and consider which question to pose. He is rarely willing to be this open with me.

‘Why me?’ I work up the courage to ask him. ‘Of all the women you could have chosen from - the wealthy, the beautiful, the famous, the titled and the enobled - why me?’

‘Why you?’ he echoes back at me. ‘I could just as easily ask you ‘why did you choose me, an armour-clad, badly injured, and cranky Sith Lord’, but you asked it first, so I will answer.’

His weight shifts a little as he settles me more comfortably in his arms.

‘This,’ he says simply. ‘This is why.’

‘That’s all?’ I reply, both puzzled and a bit confused.

‘You could have ran away, refused me, rejected me, or done anything else,’ Ani lists possibilities, ‘but instead you willingly let me hold you and stayed in my arms, and that changed everything. I had at last found someone who didn’t fear me, someone who loved me, someone I could spend my life with.’

‘I …,’ I stop what I was about to say.

I had loved him, and trusted him to a certain extent even before we had met. He didn’t know that, then and took a risk, and perhaps a large one on his part at the time. Prodding at my memories, only one thing, more a feeling than a precise event or knowledge with the weight of fact behind it, comes to me. Despite his choices in life and the path he has chosen to follow, under it all he is an honourable warrior. Once his loyalty is given, freely and wholly, he won’t waver unless solid evidence persuades him to reconsider. His heart is mine and Anakin will always protect me because of that.

‘You what?’ he prods me to complete what I intended to tell him.

‘I loved you,’ I tell him. ‘Loved you long before we met.’

‘And…’ he continues to press.

He wants my honest response to his question, and I can’t give him one, at least not a complete one. Too much has been removed from my memories for me to give him all of the reasons. I think carefully, focussing on the time he spent with me on Earth.

‘You were kind to me,’ I finally answer. ‘I was stubborn and difficult, and a bit of a brat, and you could have been cruel in return but were not.’

‘You were socially inept and afraid to tell me what you felt,’ Ani reminds me, ‘and I had the most important reason of all to be kind to you.’

My husband doesn’t say it. Instead, he lets me feel it, his love, projected in a way only the two of us can share.

***

She is still so uncertain, so emotionally fragile and grief stricken from our son’s death that she needs constant reassurance from me that all is well between us and that I won’t ever leave her. I lift my hand to her hair and brush it with my gloved fingers, letting it slide through them as I pour my love for her into and through the Force and across our bond. Perhaps a different tactic than the ones I have already tried might help her through her grief.

I carefully gauge just how much I can leave our bond open without it being obvious to anyone else then slowly ease the flow of emotions between us, reducing and leaving it at the level I had decided on. Maia will feel me constantly, consciously, now, as a solid emotional presence in her mind.

‘Anakin?’ she asks.

‘You need me there, in your mind, as a support for you,’ I reassure her, ‘so there I am and there I will stay.’

I sense her curiosity, her presence skirting around where our bond is anchored in her mind. While I have used it in the past to communicate with her, and have usually left it open enough for her to sense I am safe, this is the first time I will always be there in a stronger and more firmly controlled manner.

‘It’s the reverse of what you did when my empathy was running amuck,’ Maia observes.

‘Yes,’ I admit, a bit surprised by her quick insight. ‘You will sense my presence continuously, as I will yours.’

She tucks her head under my chin and relaxes. I know she is listening for my heart beat again. Rather than move, I leave her be and hold her close. My wife is quiet and content, as am I, and our bond resonates with how attuned we are with one another. In battle, we could fight side by side or back to back, each knowing instantly what the other would do and act accordingly.

Tomorrow, I decide. Tomorrow, I will test her as I was once tested.

***

I rest my head on Ani’s chest and let out a contented sigh. He’s covered in sweat, as am I, and I can feel the heat from his body on my skin.

‘That felt good,’ I admit. ‘I want more of the same.’

‘Again?’ he asks, sounding a bit surprised.

So far, he has just used his hands and mouth on me, and with only those had me begging for more and calling out his name. Tracing circles around the control box on his chest with a finger, I debate whether or not to wait until morning or to take advantage of his willingness to let me have my way with him through the night.

‘Could we play a game, Ani?’ I ask him, not at all certain he will agree to it.

‘We should share a quick shower, first,’ Ani offers, trying to tempt me.

‘Only if you are my prisoner this time, Sith Lord,’ I tease him.

‘As my Lady wishes, so will it be,’ he replies, amused by my suggestion. ‘I will put my armour on for you, but I want a proper kiss before I do that.’

***

She doesn’t have the physical strength or enough proficiency with the Force to hold me in place against my will. The fourth time I escape and pin her beneath me, my wife gives up and lies there without any attempt to fight back.

‘I surrender. You win, Sith Lord,’ she concedes, rather than asking me to release her so she can try to restrain me once again. ‘Do what you want to me. I won’t resist.’

I feel her desires and my body’s reaction to them. Leaving our bond as open as it is means that every sexual urge she has prompts a physical response from me, a response she then feels in return. Twisting my fingers in her unbound hair, I give it a gentle tug.

‘I want you, my wife, but tonight is yours,’ I admit. ‘If you like, you could take off my codpiece, and straddle me. I will guide myself in, and you can control what we do after that.’

Maia hesitates then complies with my suggestion after I roll off of her and onto my back. It takes a minute to move us both into a comfortable position and sweep her nightgown out of our way, before I rest my hands on her hips to steady her. There is no objection when I lower her downwards, barely entering her, noting how tight her body is in this position and the difficulty I am having in pushing into her. I let go of her and brush her face with a fingertip.

‘You’re in charge, now,’ I give her leave to do as she wishes.

She rests her hands on my chest and varies what she does, sometimes slow or fast, but never very deep, and always keeping me within her. My control is such that nothing she does will trigger an orgasm until I allow it, so I entertain myself by watching the expressions on her face and feeling her pleasure over our bond. 

‘Ready?’ she finally asks, and I know she has had enough of teasing me.

Maia’s movements are faster now, each one forcing me deeper within her, each one eliciting a soft cry from her lips. When my wife at last takes all of me in, her body finally flat against my own for the first time in months, I feel a spike of pain from her, but neither of us can stop what she has triggered. Muscles clamp hard around me as my hands at her waist prevent her from pulling away. My hips drive upwards into her, and I hear myself call her name and her moans of pleasure in response to my actions. Only after I am finished, my climax complete, do I let go of her, allowing her to move off of me.

I push myself up, to rest my back against the wall and open my arms to my wife. She quickly crawls over to me and into them. Her body is trembling against mine as she lies there, recovering from what we just did.

‘I hurt you,’ I admit, my fingers stroking her shoulder.

‘Just a little,’ she reveals. ‘Just at the end. There is no pain, now, and what we did felt good.’

Her face reddens in a blush at that admission, so I caress her cheek with my fingers, amused by her shy reaction. I miss her bashfulness and maiden’s innocence. Teaching her lovemaking was one of the things I enjoyed doing early in our relationship.

‘I think our fun is done for the night,’ I decide. ‘If you are sore when we wake in the morning, we should wait a few days.’

Maia doesn’t raise any protest to that, so she must be feeling more uncomfortable than she is willing to admit. I shift her about in my arms, settling us both on our sides, and holding her securely to my chest. It’s late and I will leave my armour on rather than get up and remove it.

‘Anakin,’ a sleepy voice calls my name. ‘Could you tell me a story, please, love? You always tell me such good ones.’

I lightly squeeze her hand, held firmly in mine, resting in the center of her chest, and do as she has requested. The more comical the situation, the more she enjoys hearing the tale, so I select one from my time as a padawan, hoping she falls asleep before I reach the most embarrassing part.

‘Let me tell you about the time I started a food fight in the Jedi Temple…’

***

DAY 2

Ani has been stubborn about not letting me know me what we are going to do today, so I have no idea what his plans are. After leaving the children in Cyran’s care, we walk along the usual route to the salle, but before reaching that room, he steers me into the gym instead. I stare at the men who are there, obviously waiting for us to arrive. Rik and Thirsk are on my staff, but the other three are strangers.

‘Commanders,’ my husband greets them.

Your task is simple, he tells me. Make them feel an emotion, any emotion, but control it so that it doesn’t overwhelm them.

I look up into his mask, confused by what he has told me to do. Ani has been adamant that I should always keep my empathy under wraps, so hearing that he wants me to use it like this is rather strange.

Completely blocking the use of any ability, without having complete control over its practical application, is dangerous, he reveals. You need to learn how to use it effectively as well as how to keep it locked down.

I don’t want to hurt them, I admit to him.

Then don’t, he suggests. Choose emotions which won’t cause them any harm, and keep what you project tightly reined in. They know what to expect since all of them have volunteered to help you with this.

I focus my attention on Rik. The pilot has a good sense of humour, so maybe I should see if I can make him laugh. Amusement should be a harmless enough choice. Closing my eyes, I think carefully about what I should do. Start with just a little, I decide, then increase it. As soon as something happens, I will stop. Hopefully that will be enough to satisfy my husband.

Rik crosses his arms over his chest and stares at me. He’s becoming bored with standing there and waiting. I push the emotion I want him to feel up a notch and focus it on the pilot. Laugh, I think at him, let out a giggle or a smile, or do something to show I have been successful. The side of his mouth twitches, as I sense his resistance give way, and he finally reacts, doubling over, laughing almost hysterically, with tears running down his face.

‘That’s not funny,’ Rik gasps out when I quickly release him.

‘You should not have resisted,’ Ani reminds him. ‘I warned you not to.’

Anakin, I don’t want to do this anymore, I tell my husband.

Make Thirsk feel hungry, he suggests in response to my reluctance, adding when I stubbornly ignore him. I won’t let you leave this room until you demonstrate to me that you can control your empathy completely.

***

Maia fights me at every opportunity, consistently refusing to use her empathy as I need her to. While I understand why she doesn’t want to do this, my wife must learn how to control every aspect of her abilities, and in this case, the only way she can do that is by using it.

When she has finally run through the range of emotions, save for the most negative ones and those I deem unsuitable for her to project onto the others who are here, I dismiss the men and let them go. Each of them had offered to help with this exercise and have more than earned the extra leave time I have granted them.

My wife, though, is not at all pleased with me. She turns her back to me, her arms wrapped securely around her, and flinches away when I touch her shoulder.

‘I feel filthy,’ Maia tells me. ‘Don’t ever ask me to do that again. No one should be forced to feel what someone else wants them to.’

She shivers a little and I know she is remembering what she did, unintentionally, to my flagship’s crew.

‘If you can’t control it in every aspect,’ I state firmly, ‘you run the risk of something triggering another episode of your empathy going wild, with you unable to recognize that and successfully stop it.’

I consider for a moment what to do. A reminder and then practice with the most potent of emotions are needed.

‘You have used your empathy on me before,’ I remind her. ‘Remember what you did, that first day on the Executor, and how it affected me?’

There is a slow inhalation from her as the implications sink in. She had pushed through my shields, pulled me to her, and driven my desires for her to the boiling point, although I did not let her know that at the time.

‘You need to learn how to project and control those emotions, too,’ I insist. ‘We are alone and I am willing to help you. I won’t block what you chose to do.’

This time when I reach over to her she does not resist, and allows me to turn her about and pull her to me. Her forehead rests against my chest as I feel her run through a range of emotions, each briefly, lightly washing over me in turn. My wife’s control over this is precise, delicate, when I am the target and she can gauge the exact levels I am experiencing over our bond. Only when the negative emotions and most intimate ones are left does she hesitate.

‘Go ahead,’ I encourage her to continue.

Anger seizes me then fear and hate. Each I neutralize, drain away before it can take hold. Affection I respond to by caressing her face, and love by settling her closer to me in my arms. When she projects lust, the last emotion for her to try, I don’t resist. My physical reaction makes her laugh, but she has seemingly forgotten about our bond, and as my desire for her rises, so does hers for me, each feeding on the other until I am fully ready to make love to her, right here and now.

‘My Lord, we shouldn’t, not here,’ Maia finally objects, once she realizes what she has triggered in me.

With a low growl, I lift a hand to the nape of her neck, release the closures for her gown, and drag it down her back, pulling hard enough to tear the fabric, destroying the dress, and leaving her body exposed to my view. I pin her against me with an arm and lift her up, preparing to lower her to the floor.

‘Stop it, Anakin,’ she tells me. ‘I don’t want you to do this to me.’

I freeze in place and slowly, gently set her down on her feet. Regardless of what Maia has projected into my mind, I will never force myself on her. Backing up a step, I unhook my cloak and wrap it around her, covering her now nearly naked and trembling body. My wife’s eyes are wide, almost childlike in shock, as she pulls the fabric tight across her breasts.

‘I am so sorry, Ani,’ she begins an apology.

‘Don’t apologize to me when I am the one who should be doing so to you,’ I reply. ‘Emotions are not a substitute for consent.’

She bites her lip and stretches out her hand, so I take it.

‘You don’t understand,’ my wife explains. ‘I forced you to want me with my empathy, kept driving you on, and then I couldn’t let you go through with it. It felt wrong. It felt coerced. It felt … ’ she pauses, looks away from me, unable to finish.

‘... like rape,’ I complete the sentence for her.

There is a barely perceptible nod on her part, one with understanding behind it. Maia recognizes that what she thinks she did to me was a violation of trust on several levels, and she has learned a valuable lesson, taught it to herself, in fact, about the ethics of her empathic abilities.

I silently consider what to do while she stands there, eyes fixed on the floor awaiting the reprimand she is sure I will give to her. No real harm was done to me. I can survive a bit of private embarrassment about the situation, and will have to go deal with a still throbbing, unaddressed erection, but for her the consequences will be worse, since she will have to return to my quarters, walking through the public corridors, with only my cloak as a covering. There will be lewd gossip for many days, spread by some of the crew who will see her, about what happened in here, which I will ignore and she will stoically endure.

I activate my comlink, opting to deal with Maia’s problem, first.

‘Daini,’ I call to my wife’s aide. ‘My Lady needs something suitable to duel in - a tunic and trousers, and her boots. Bring that down to us.’

Next, I choose to deal with mine.

‘Wait for your aide,’ I tell my wife. ‘You can change into your practical clothes once she is here.’

I walk away from her, seeking privacy in the closest ‘fresher, and lock its door behind me before yanking off my codpiece. Once freed, I begin stroking myself, resting the other hand against the wall as a support. Maia can sense what I am doing, feel it through our bond, even though she cannot hear my gasps or when I call her name as I finally climax. I keep the pleasure I experience to myself. She doesn’t need to feel that from me when she has clearly told me she doesn’t want sex or anything to do with it right now.

***

He’s angry with me, I decide, when he goes into the ‘fresher and deliberately keeps the pleasure he is giving himself away from our bond. Despite that, I know exactly what he is doing, before he cuts it off entirely. I sink to my knees on the floor and start to cry. The Sith Lord has never done this to me before, never relieved an erection in this way, or blocked me out to this extent, but I deserve it for what I did to him. While there have been times, years ago, when he threatened to compel me into sex with him using the Force, not once has he ever done so; and I just did that to him, using my empathy to drive him into having sex with me.

When Daini appears, my clothes and boots in her hands, she stops and stares at me, unsure what to do. I must be the sight, my dress in shreds and thrown aside, me on the floor in my underwear with Ani’s cloak over me, and my face wet with tears.

‘Just put them down and go,’ I tell her.

She drops everything on the floor in front of her and flees from the room. I suspect she doesn’t want to know any more about the situation than what she has already seen. At least I can trust her to not say anything. Crawling over to the pile of clothes, I start thinking about what I should do. Manipulating my husband the way I did with my empathy was unacceptable, and I know better than to ever try it again, with him or anyone else.

‘With great power comes great responsibility,’ I whisper to myself, mangling a quote from Voltaire.

I pick up the tunic and hold it to my chest. Everything I have, even my clothes, I owe all of it to my husband, the man I love, the man who has soundly, justifiably, rejected me for my behaviour by shrinking our bond to almost nothing.

***

Once I am finished and cleaned up, I slowly, carefully widen our bond again, and quickly realize my wife is spiralling rapidly into despair. With a touch, I open the ‘fresher door, and then go to her, stopping to stand behind where she is collapsed on the floor in a heap, crying as if her heart were breaking, her tunic gathered to her chest.

‘Lesson learned,’ I quietly say to myself.

Reaching down, I pull my cloak up to cover her bare back. She has trapped herself in an empathic feedback loop, one negative emotion or thought driving another until she cannot find herself a way out of it. This happened once before, after Black Three’s death, and I need to snap her out of it immediately, without giving her any sympathy to act as a form of reinforcement.

‘Get up, Maia,’ I command her. ‘Get up and get dressed.’

She hears me but does not obey. I have few options left. Maia needs to stop this on her own or I will have to ask Leanan to stop it for her, before my wife’s lack of control harms our son or triggers a miscarriage.

‘You are putting our son at risk and have two choices,’ I ruthlessly tell her. ‘Regain control and dress yourself, or continue having hysterics until I have to carry you down to Medical, in your underclothes, for Leanan to sedate.’

My words shock her into silencing her weeping. After a few minutes of deep, ragged breaths, she moves a little, pulling her boots closer, and shifting herself to sit upright. My wife is a mess, her hair tangled, face streaked with tears, and eyes red from crying. When she tries to put on the tunic, her hands shake to the point where she cannot close it in front. I leave her be. Rushing her won’t help and will only upset her more. Somehow she manages to stand and finish dressing.

‘You should go clean up in the ‘fresher,’ I suggest.

Her path to it weaves back and forth, reflecting how unsteady she still is, but at least my wife is on her feet, properly dressed, and no longer crying.

I wait until she is hidden from my sight before letting out a frustrated sigh. She has interpreted what I did to relieve my thwarted desires, without involving her in that as a courtesy to her, as a punishment directed at her instead.

***

The Sith Lord is sitting, cross-legged, on the floor and obviously meditating when I finally work up the courage to return to the gym an hour after I had left it. A part of me wants to flee back to the safety of the ‘fresher, but instead I make myself walk across the floor and sit down in front of my husband. Sooner or later, I will have to face him and there is no point in delaying that any longer. I shut my eyes and attempt to start my own meditation. Our bond is quiet, reflecting the stillness and calm in Ani’s mind, and to my great surprise, there is no anger to be found in him, only love and support.

Little goddess, he quietly calls to me. You cannot manipulate or force me into anything I am unwilling to do, not with Jedi mind tricks, and not with your empathy. I wanted to make love to you because I desired it, not because of your empathy, and I thought you wanted it, too. Next time, I will ask, first, and not assume.

A gloved finger reaches over, traces my cheekbone, and brushes away the tear which has escaped from me.

Know that I would never intentionally hurt you, he adds, or ever ask you to harm another.  

I keep my chin down and eyes closed. If I open them, I am sure I will start to cry again. He has forgiven me completely for my mistaken assumptions about what I thought I did to him and what he did to himself. Ani’s hand moves from my face to my waist, checking on our son, before he rests it on top of one of mine.

I knew your empathy would be a problem when we were on your homeworld, he admits. Jedi empaths were trained as healers, but they could only feel the emotions of others, not project or manipulate them in the way you are able to. Sith are not empathic at all, so I do not know how to help you. In this, I have failed you as a teacher.

I start a protest which he silences with a finger across my lips.

I cannot teach you as you need to be taught, but someone else can, he reveals. Your brother will bring them to you after I leave.

Anakin, I try again, only to be cut short a second time.

We will discuss all of it later, he reassures me. I will be in the large salle, duelling with a few ‘droids. When you are finished in here, come to me there.

I watch Ani stand and let him go without trying to delay him.

It is only a few minutes before my brother appears. He drops himself inelegantly to the floor, sitting in front of me with a serious expression on his face.

‘Your Sith Lord husband has finally admitted that he needs a Jedi Master to teach you,’ Michael tells me, ‘so I went and found someone who can help.’

I raise a sceptical eyebrow at him.

‘I don’t see anybody in here except us,’ I state.

‘It’s harder for him to manifest than for me,’ Michael scolds. ‘I have you as a permanent anchor point. He has no one who can do that for him, so he has to come to me instead. Be patient and wait.’

‘And?’ I prod at him, a bit curious who this mysterious being might be.

‘You’ll see,’ my brother teases.

At that I close my eyes, just to be stubborn, just to be a bit of a bratty younger sister, refusing to open them until I sense another presence in the room.

‘Oh…,’ I slowly say as I stare at the man in Jedi robes who has settled himself on the floor next to Michael.

He’s tall, I decide, and middle aged. There is grey in his long brown hair and beard, so he is no youngster. Two kind blue eyes look into mine, and he smiles in a way designed to reassure me. Like my brother, a soft blue glow dances across his skin. My new teacher is a Jedi ghost.

‘I have been told that you have a problem controlling your empathy,’ he tells me. ‘I owe Anakin my help and am forbidden to offer it to him, but there is nothing to stop me from aiding and teaching you, and you are in desperate need of proper training that he cannot give you.’

‘And you are?’ I ask, my curiosity running wild.

‘Call me Qui-Gon,’ he reveals. ‘You have much to learn and little time to do it in. We should start immediately.’

***

I effortlessly dismantle the ‘droid, using one precise lightsaber strike after another. A corridor away I can sense someone I knew long ago, someone I can trust to do no harm to my wife. Of all the Jedi he could have run to for help, I can only be grateful that the pest chose that particular one. No others, if they still exist in that form, would have the least bit of sympathy for me or for her.

For a few minutes I debate what to do next. It has been years since I spent much time working with two ‘sabers so perhaps I should duel a few ‘droids in that manner. I have already promised to teach my wife Niman, and if there are any problems to be straightened out, I would prefer to do that in private, rather than make a fool of myself in front of her.

***

‘You have a firm grasp of all the basics, now,’ Qui-Gon tells me. ‘All you need to do is practice, and your brother can help you with that. If you have trouble with any of it, he can always bring me to you again.’

He reaches over to touch my hand with his then leans farther forward, brushing it across my middle.

‘You will bear Anakin another son,’ he states.

For some reason, his observation embarrasses me greatly and I feel my cheeks redden in response. Perhaps it is that so few know of my latest pregnancy which has brought it on, or the intimacy of his touch and the casualness with which he reveals it.

‘Your secret is safe with me,’ he assures me. ‘I know that you love him and he loves you. Love led to his downfall and will be his salvation. Be there for him, when he needs you the most.’

My brother and the Jedi Master exchange a look. These two are up to something, but I suspect that neither of them will own up to it.

‘We should go,’ Michael decides, ‘before too many questions can be asked.’

‘The opinions of others have never mattered to me,’ Qui-Gon admits, ‘and the Jedi Council’s opinion least of all, but it is time to go.’

‘I’ll come see you tomorrow,’ my brother promises.

I feel a quick kiss on my cheek as he disappears, taking my new teacher with him.

***

Maia is hesitant to approach me when she comes into the salle. The pieces of destroyed duelling ‘droids strewn across the floor and the intact ones stored to the side are making her nervous. I shut off my lightsabers, return them to my belt, and invite her over to me with a gesture. Her first few steps are slow, but she soon runs to me and what she sees as safety. There is no need to say anything once she is secure in my embrace.

My wife’s mind is quiet, her shields almost glasslike in their reflectiveness. Not a single wisp of emotion can be found, save for those I can feel from her over our bond. Her control is flawless, and I can only marvel at how quickly she has progressed under Qui-Gon’s tutelage. I have been an arrogant fool to think I could manage her empathic training, and I should have asked her brother to find her a willing teacher long before now. My half-remembered, haphazard Jedi training from Obi-Wan and Sith disciplines imposed on me by Palpatine are no match for the knowledge of a true Jedi Master with years of experience teaching padawans.

I feel her relax against my chest and run my fingers through her hair.

‘Anakin,’ she quietly says my name.

One of the duelling ‘droids stirs then another, responding to the sound of her voice.

‘Anakin!’ she repeats, alarmed by what is happening.

‘Guard my back,’ I order, spinning her behind me and setting one of my ‘sabers in her hand as I move her.

***

My mouth goes dry and I start to panic as I see his duelling ‘droids begin to move towards us. I don’t trust those things at all, but something must be seriously wrong if they are not under my husband’s control. I hear his ‘saber ignite and turn on the one he had given me. His back feels solid against mine behind me. This will be the first time I have fought an opponent where the risks are real and life and limb are on the line.

Relax a bit, he tells me. Let yourself sink into the Force and allow it to guide you. I will cover and protect you as you do the same for me.

Ani? I question him

His response is to shift into a ready stance, his weapon held in a low guard as he allows the ‘droids to come to him rather than going to them and risk opening too large a space between us. I decide that I had better do the same and prepare myself for the first attack. There is no way we will be able to simply walk to the door and leave. Our only choice is to fight our way clear to an escape.

***

Without seeing her actions, I sense my wife settle into a rhythm of alternately parrying and attacking, and I promptly praise her whenever I know she has been successful in landing a hit. Fighting as a team is a new concept for her, one alien to the traditional training from her homeworld, yet she complements my every move as if we have worked this way for years. Each of us is fully able to anticipate what the other will do and act in concert with their decisions.

Quickly dispatching the last of my mechanical opponents, I wait for Maia to do the same with hers. The salle looks like a battlefield, with not one ‘droid left in a functioning state. Sacrificing them was more than worth it. I am certain, now, that if it was ever necessary, I can count on my wife to work in tandem with me in a fight.

‘That was very well done,’ I tell her, ‘but I need to order some new duelling ‘droids.’

‘Stupid ‘droids,’ she says, giving a severed limb a kick to express her disgust at them. ‘Hopefully the next batch won’t be defective.’

I don’t enlighten her to my trick.

‘Shall we go have lunch?’ I ask, offering her my arm instead of a confession.

There is no hesitation in her touch when she sets her hand above my elbow. It’s long past the time when we would normally have eaten, and I need to care for her properly. For what remains of the afternoon, after our meal, I will see that she lies down and hopefully sleeps for a while.

Later, after she has rested, we will talk.

DAY 4

While I wait, I contemplate what I must do in the next few days. I will have little time to ensure that the battlestation’s weapon system is fully functional before my master arrives. Tapping a finger on my seat’s armrest, I shift impatiently at the delay in my shuttle’s departure from the Executor. The sooner I can meet with Jerjerrod, the faster I can begin my assigned task.

Colonel Jendon and his co-pilot, Captain Yorr, sense my irritation.

‘This is taking too long,’ I hear Jendon mutter.

‘Not our fault,’ Yorr whispers in reply. ‘There’s some sort of problem with a supply delivery.’

I ignore their chatter. While I prefer having my old wingman in the pilot’s seat, Rik needs to remain available to fly my wife and children to safety, if the situation warrants it. These substitutes will just have to learn how to work with me and not annoy me too much at the same time.

In another minute, my shuttle lifts from the hangar bay floor at last, heading towards the construction project I have been assigned to.

‘Command Station, this is ST321. Code Clearance Blue,’ Jendon states over the comm, giving no sign of the nervousness he is feeling in his voice. ‘We’re starting our approach. Deactivate the security shield.’

‘The security deflector shield will be deactivated when we have confirmation of your code transmission,’ the controller’s voice replies. ‘Stand by.’

‘Quick as you can, please,’ Jendon quietly encourages them. ‘This better not take too long. He’s in no mood to wait.’

‘You are cleared to proceed,’ the response promptly comes back.

‘We are starting our approach,’ the pilot confirms.

The lights in the passenger compartment shut off, and the battlestation, half-complete, its superstructure an open framework on one side, hangs in space in front of us. It grows larger as we draw nearer, heading towards one of the smaller hangars. I wait, silently, for the landing procedures to begin, not moving until I see that Jerjerrod has made an appearance at the hangar’s entrance. Then, I stand and watch him through the front viewports, making him come to me as I observe him.

The man approaching my shuttle is confident and arrogant, and despite what my visit implies, he does not move one bit faster than he feels is absolutely necessary. We have met before, and I had assigned him to this particular posting, but I have not spoken with him in person since my last inspection here, many months ago. When he feels he is close enough, he stops and waits, so I drop the shuttle’s ramp and walk down it, noting that my presence has made him just as nervous as my pilot and co-pilot were. To either side of him, lined up and standing ramrod straight are a few token members of his crew. I note their Commander’s quick smile and bowed neck, his first attempt to curry favour and deflect punishment, but I do not pause or stop when I reach him, instead walking by him and forcing him to quickly turn on his heel to keep pace with me.

‘Lord Vader, this is an unexpected pleasure,’ he greets me. ‘We are honoured by your presence.’

I wave aside his words with a gesture.

‘You may dispense with the pleasantries, Commander,’ I tell him. ‘I am here to put you back on schedule.’

‘I assure you, Lord Vader,’ he tries to placate me, ‘my men are working as fast as they can.’

‘Perhaps I can find new ways to motivate them,’ I suggest.

He stops, so I turn to face him. My reputation is such that he already knows what I might do.

‘I tell you, this station will be operational as planned,’ Jerjerrod insists.

‘The Emperor does not share your optimistic appraisal of the situation,’ I reveal, pointing a finger at his chest.

The Commander shakes his head in frustration and denial, his expression reflecting his inner feelings.

‘But he asks the impossible,’ Jerjerrod admits, quietly, insistently adding, ‘I need more men.’

We are both acutely aware that there is no way he can easily meet the deadline my master has set. However, if he fails, I fail, and that is not acceptable.

‘Then perhaps you can tell him that yourself, when he arrives,’ I hint at my master’s plans.

‘The Emperor’s coming here?’ he asks, becoming visibly upset at that piece of news.

‘That is correct, Commander,’ I answer. ‘And he is most displeased with your apparent lack of progress.’

‘We shall double our efforts,’ he quickly promises.

‘I hope so, Commander, for your sake,’ I warn him. ‘The Emperor is not as forgiving as I am.’

I let that sink in and watch him lick his lips and nod in fear. Jerjerrod knows that I kill those who fail me, but my executions are swift and painless in comparison with what my master might do to him. Leaving the Commander to ponder how he should proceed, I spin about and continue on my path across the hangar. My quarters are located many levels above us, and I want to try contacting Luke before I start my first round of inspections.

When I arrive at the room with my meditation pod, I quickly glance around to see if all is in order, but don’t bother checking the rest of my quarters. The other rooms will be bare and empty, save for my office and work space. I have never felt it necessary to equip what is here with any more than the basics since I have always spent my nights back on the Executor, with my wife, rather than here and alone.

I open the pod and settle myself inside it. This will require mental concentration on my part, and an open and receptive mind on Luke’s. He has never answered me before, but I suspect that he has heard my overtures to him and deliberately, belligerently stayed silent.

‘Luke,’ I call, hoping he will respond. ‘Luke.’

No reply.

‘Join me on the dark side of the Force,’ I entice him.

Silence.

‘My son,’ I reveal, ‘it is the only way.’

The only way he can save his friends from harm, and the only way I can easily protect him from my master.

‘Luke,’ I entreat him. ‘Luke.’

This time I feel a distant and distinct flash of recognition on his part, but he is soon hidden and silent again. Confirmation, I think triumphantly. My stubborn son will come to me, exactly when I expect and need him to.

I call up the holochess game I have been playing with my wife, and swap the view to that of an empty board. With a touch, I add an opposing Emperor, then for my own pieces a knight clad in my armour, a Queen bearing a sword guarding three pawns, and a pawn which is poised to transform itself, although what it will become is still uncertain.

Soon, all of the pieces I need will be here, on the board, and in play.

Soon, all too soon, it will be time for the end game to begin.

***

I reach over to discover that the opposite side of the bed, which was empty when I fell asleep, now has an occupant. My husband must have returned a few minutes ago and opted not to wake me.

‘You’re awake,’ he notes. ‘I did try to be quiet and sneak in.’

He rolls onto his side, props himself up with an elbow and looks down at me.

‘You still need to rest some more,’ Ani fusses a little.

‘I had a long nap this afternoon,’ I confess. ‘I expected you to be back late.’

‘We could finish our game,’ he offers.

I touch his scarred cheek with a fingertip. It’s long past the time when we would usually be asleep, and we are both completely awake, but I am not in the mood to play chess with him. He senses my reluctance, and opts to quickly kiss me on the forehead instead of pressing for an answer.

‘We will play over the Holonet, tomorrow,’ he decides. ‘It will be a way to distract myself between inspections and meetings.’

‘Did it go well, today?’ I decide to risk the question.

‘As well as I expected,’ the Sith Lord admits. ‘This project is seriously behind schedule. I need to find a way to motivate the construction crews to work longer and faster, but too many threats create fear, and that is more likely to lead to mistakes being made. If what he requires is not ready or close to it when my master arrives, I will bear the blame for that failure.’

I shiver at that revelation. Although he won’t admit it openly, he’s worried.

‘Palpatine won’t harm me,’ Ani reminds me. ‘He might send us into exile on Vjun or keep me away from you for a while by assigning various tasks to me, but he will not do anything that might risk you or our son. Still, I prefer to avoid any form of punishment if I am able. Tomorrow I will try another tactic.’

‘Bribe them,’ I suggest. ‘Give them an incentive, like more leave time that they can take later.’

‘An incentive,’ he echoes my words. ‘I can think of an incentive I prefer.’

He pulls me closer to his body and waits for my response. As he has promised, there are no more assumptions on his part about when I am willing to have sex with him. Instead, Ani asks or makes suggestions, in his own manner, and lets me answer him in turn, unless I openly offer him an invitation.

Yes, I reply, reaching up to draw his mouth down to mine. I want you now, my husband.

He doesn’t resist me.

Tomorrow, and sleep, can wait.

DAY 5

***

After spending the morning touring the battlestation, I have finally returned to my office on board it. There are a dozen high priority messages waiting in the queue for me to deal with, but I choose to view the one from Jix, first. While there might be more pressing developments here, I need to know what is happening on Tatooine.

‘Hi uncle Dee,’ Jix opens, as always, before trying one of his tired jokes. ‘It’s too hot, here, so I hope the weather is better where you are. Skywalker sent Jabba a message and two ‘droids as a bribe, yesterday. A bounty hunter showed up with the wookiee, Chewbacca, today, and claimed the price on his head. It’s been quiet, too quiet, so something must be up. Gotta go. The slug wants some entertainment, and I don’t plan on being it.’

Luke is moving his allies into place before stepping into Jabba’s lair himself. The bounty hunter is obviously one of his friends in disguise, but if I can see through my son’s tactics, then so can the Hutt. Were it myself, I wouldn’t waste my time with subtlety and false cleverness. In my past dealings with the crime lord, I have come at him alone, in a full frontal assault.  

Stop worrying, I remind myself. Luke will rescue his smuggler friend and arrive when I expect him to, exactly as I found in Maia’s memories. There is no need to fret about that. Jix will keep sending updates until my son is on his way from Tatooine to here.

The next message I view is from Inquisitor Tremayne, and does not require a reply from me. He will be arriving in seven days, bringing his ship, the Interrogator, with him. There will be little time to discuss the Rebels’ planned attack on the shield generator complex and conceal his presence on the moon, but between the troops stationed there now, and the reinforcements I will send with Tremayne, the base will be secure.

Reluctantly, I turn my attention to the roster of meetings and inspections Jerjerrod has flagged for today. From the reports I glanced through this morning, my arrival yesterday has prompted a flurry of activity and overtime. He needs to concentrate on having the laser system functional, I decide, everything else must come second. Without the weapon, the battlestation is a useless metallic hulk, and should the Rebels somehow succeed in their attack on the shield generator, it will be a defenceless target for them to aim at. I send a one line message to the Moff before leaving my pod and heading to the meeting room to speak with him.

I suspect it is going to be a very long day.

***

‘Who is that?’ Mikal asks.

This time he is pointing at a picture of my father.

‘That’s my father, your grandfather,’ I tell him.

He scrolls the images down, to another one of my parents at home. We have been going through my pictures, archived on my datapad, as a way to entertain ourselves. While I have many photos of my relatives, I know that my husband doesn’t have many images of his, other than security footage of his son and an old hologram of his mother from her identi-tab.  Strangely, he has never mentioned his father or really spoken much about his first wife, and I have never worked up the courage to ask. Some topics are best left alone.

‘It’s time for Lord Mikal’s lesson,’ Thirsk announces.

The commando is precisely on time, as he always is, and my son bounces from the chair to join him. They will be back, in an hour, which will give me an opportunity to see to some of the things I need to do.

‘In an hour, Commander,’ I remind him, although that is probably unnecessary.

‘Of course, my Lady,’ he replies.

‘Bye, mommy,’ Mikal tells me as they disappear from the den.

I turn off my datapad and set it aside. Closing my eyes, I take a few minutes to relax and consider what I need to prioritize and what can be left for later. My clothes need to be sorted through since I will soon be hiding an expanding middle again, and there is a stack of correspondence to deal with. The twins are sleeping in their room, allowing me to have some time to myself. Soon, Leanan will be here to check on me. Ani sees the constant monitoring of my pregnancy as necessary, but I know that his fussing is motivated as much by his grief for the son we lost as it is for his concerns about my health. The Sith Lord has never allowed himself to mourn in public and rarely reveals to me how deeply he feels about it in private. Yesterday, when he slipped away to grieve alone, I felt his pain as if it were my own. This must be another consequence from how wide he has opened the bond between us. Neither of us can really hide from the other what they are experiencing at the emotional level.

Maia, he calls to me.

Yes, dear, I tease him.

Go check our game, he suggests. I’ve made a move.

I humour him, turn on the holo projector sitting on the table in front of me, and flip through the boards in play to see what he has done. When I find it, I start to laugh. My husband is trying to be clever, but I can anticipate his next few moves. With a light touch, I shift an advisor along a diagonal, setting up my own trap to spring on him. The projector in his quarters, wherever he is, will instantly display the change.

Sneaky wife, he replies in reaction.

The Sith Lord’s next move promptly appears in front of me. I make myself comfortable and settle in for a while. He will play until he has another meeting or inspection, or Leanan arrives. Then, he will excuse himself and contact me when he is free again, later.

I must go, Ani admits after another ten minutes. Jerjerrod wants to show me how much progress they have made on the focussing system.

Leanan will be here, soon, I remind him.

Don’t wait up for me, he orders. It will be very late when I return.

DAY 6

***

I wake to the chiming of the comm and let out an irritated growl. The pattern it is ringing in does not belong to my master. Only a few other signals are allowed to make it through to my bedroom, so this had better be important.

‘Anakin,’ my wife mumbles a low complaint as she stirs in my arms.

I move my right arm from under her head and lift my left from her waist. Before I roll onto my back, I quickly kiss her neck.

‘Sorry, my love,’ I apologize. ‘It will take a few minutes for me to see to this.’

She pulls her favourite cloak of mine over her head in an attempt to mute the noise. I throw back the covers, sit up, and grab my robe from the floor. Stalking towards the comm panel, I wrap the fabric around myself and rein in my temper at this unwelcome, early morning call. First, I will identify who it is then decide whether to bother with putting on my armour and dealing with it elsewhere.

‘Yes?’ I ask, after activating the comm, making it clear from my icy tone that I am not happy.

‘Uhm, hi, uncle Dee?’ Jix ventures.

‘What is it, Jix?’ I snap at him.

‘Things are getting really interesting here,’ he replies. ‘Jabba’s trophy has been thawed out, he’s acquired a new dancer, and he plans to feed a Jedi to the sarlacc.’

Luke’s clever plan has obviously not gone as he had hoped. The smuggler has been freed from the carbonite I had frozen him in, but the Princess, who I know was involved in this scheme, has been captured, along with my son. I tip my head and think carefully about what I should have my agent do. All of them will escape eventually, but I need Jix to keep an eye on what happens.

‘Stay there,’ I order. ‘Watch what happens, protect Skywalker if necessary, bring him to me if the opportunity presents itself, and contact me later with a detailed report.’

He grumbles something I can barely hear about being tired of the heat and sand, and having to put up with the members of Jabba’s swoop gang.

‘You are not on vacation, Jix,’ I growl at him, then add, ‘but try to not end up as an appetizer for the sarlacc.’

***

As soon as the Sith Lord comes back to me, I pull him close and tuck my head under his chin. Today was lonely for me, even though I did my best to keep myself busy with the children and by practicing some of my newly learned Force skills with my brother. I know Ani tried to cheer me up by playing holochess with me when he could, but I missed him anyway.

‘You’re worried,’ I quietly tell my husband what I can clearly feel from him.

‘I have much to worry about,’ he reminds me. ‘Progress is being made. I don’t expect everything to be complete on time, but enough will be finished to keep my master happy.’

I shiver against him and try to stop it. My shoulders and arms are bare and the room is cool.

‘Let me warm you up,’ Ani offers. ‘You feel a bit cold, tonight.’

I let go of him so he can retrieve a heavy blanket from a storage unit and throw it on the bed. Soon, I am snuggled up against him, my cheek resting on his chest again, appreciating the heat radiating off of him. He traces the twists in my braided hair, running his fingers up and down, using the pattern of movement to soothe me and distract himself.

‘What’s bothering you, dear?’ I risk the question.

Ani’s hand stops moving, to rest on my shoulder.

‘I can’t hide it from you,’ he admits, ‘so I will tell you what I am allowed to, no more.’

‘Is it really that bad?’ I ask.

‘Yes… and no,’ he tells me. ‘The Emperor will be here in four days. He will want to see you, and there is no way we can avoid that.’

‘I don’t want to be put on display, like a prized broodmare, for him to examine,’ I complain a little.

‘We have no choice, Maia,’ the Sith Lord firmly states. ‘I will bring you with me when he arrives, so we can both greet him at the official welcoming ceremony. If he is pleased with the work I have done, he will probably be content with that.’

Ani shifts me off of his chest. He’s tired and ready for sleep. A selfish part of me wants to keep him awake and talking to me, but he needs to rest. Tomorrow will be another long day apart for both of us.

‘Good night, dear,’ I tease him. ‘Good night, sleep tight, don’t let the bed bugs bite.’

His mouth briefly brushes against mine.

‘That must be another of your Earthisms,’ he decides as I roll onto my side and pull his arm across my waist. ‘There are no bugs in my bed, just my wife.’

Somehow, I can’t see either of us sleeping soundly tonight if I tell him what that saying refers to, and he decides to take my teasing seriously and go looking for some imaginary pests.

‘I’ll explain it in the morning,’ I promise him.

***

This time when I wake from that nightmare, it is with the Hapan Queen Mother’s mocking laughter ringing in my ears. My wife starts to shift next to me, sensing my anger and reacting to it, so I quiet her, easing her back into a deep sleep before I get out of bed. There is no point in trying to rest any more tonight, I decide, and if I stay in here, my restlessness will only wake Maia again. Stealthily, carefully, I put on my armour, slipping out to my office once I can safely exit my bedroom.

I take a seat at my desk, but don’t bother turning on my data terminal. Work can wait until morning. Instead, I stare at the hologram of my wife, with an infant Mikal on her lap, which I keep on my desk. Parts of my memory have returned in detail. I know Ta’a Chume used a Gun of Command on me, and that she ordered me to be silent and to follow her into another room after she groped at my body. What happened in that room, before she let me leave it, is still a mystery and unknown, but it will eventually come back to me. I suspect that whatever occurred in there is the source of the rage I am gripped by whenever I wake from that dream.

A presence flickers nearby, so I acknowledge him.

‘Jedi pest,’ I growl. ‘What do you want?’

Michael appears, this time robed as a Sith, and drops himself into the chair across from mine.

‘I thought you might need a duelling partner,’ he offers, ‘since you and my sister destroyed all of your ‘droids.’

‘Not tonight,’ I put him off. ‘It is far too late and I am tired.’

‘Not too tired to talk to me, though. Luke has escaped from Jabba,’ he confirms the report I heard from Jix.

‘And is on his way to join the Rebel fleet,’ I add. ‘My agents on Tatooine have already told me that. The Rebels are gathering, at Sullust, in preparation for an assault on the battlestation, here.’

There is silence from my brother-in-law. He obviously knows more about this than I do, but he won’t reveal what it is to me. I pick up the holocube with the image of my wife and rotate it in my hand.

‘You know what is to come, so don’t deny it,’ I prod at him.

‘I know you need my help, but won’t ask for it,’ Michael tells me. ‘So instead of waiting for you to realize that, I am offering it, now, and saving both of us from wasting precious time.’

I set down the holocube. The pest has decided to spare me the embarrassment of admitting I can’t be everywhere, deal with every contingency, or protect everyone who must be guarded. His task, if he accepts it, is more dangerous in some ways than what I need to do.

‘It’s risky, very risky,’ I warn him. ‘Too soon and the Emperor will sense your presence. Too late and the consequences could be dire.’

‘She’s my sister and your wife,’ he reminds me. ‘She loves you and chose you to be the father of her children, my nieces and nephews. You and I might disagree on many things, but not on this. I will do what needs to be done for her sake.’

‘Very well, Jedi,’ I accept his aid. ‘Come to me tomorrow, after your sister is asleep, and we will discuss what you must do.’

He fades away, finally vanishing completely, leaving me alone with my thoughts. I activate the holochess projector, switching the view to the board I had set up two days ago. With a touch, I add another knight, this time dressed in Jedi robes, to my chessmen already present, placing him in front of my queen, guarding her and three of my pawns from the opposing Emperor.

Another piece is in play. Soon, others will be as well.

***

DAY 7

My husband is already in his armour and wide awake when I start to stir. At some point earlier in the morning he must have slipped out of bed and later returned to it without disturbing me. He’s warm to my touch and doesn’t object when I glue myself to him.

‘Anakin,’ I happily mumble at him in my half-asleep state.

‘Little goddess,’ he teases me. ‘I knew you would want to curl up with me for a while, so I came back to bed just to let you do that.’

I feel a kiss on the top of my head. He has left his helmet off so he can have his breakfast with the children and me.

‘I like spoiling you with the little things you enjoy,’ he reveals. ‘It’s much easier and less expensive than buying you fancy trinkets.’

‘Resorting to bribery, husband? That doesn’t matter to me,’ I decide, ‘and I still know what you want.’

‘Do you?’ Ani asks and in his voice I can hear the laughter he is holding back.

‘Sith Lord, you are becoming all too predictable,’ I warn him.

‘There is no time for that this morning, my love,’ he admits, ‘and not tonight, either. We will have to do without, for a few days, until I am free to be solely yours again.’

‘That’s…’ I start, but my husband breaks in and finishes it, ‘… not fair, but it is how the next few days will be.’

I don’t bother arguing with him. At the moment, whatever private time he can spare, he spends with me, and I won’t ask him to give up some of the sleep he so desperately needs just so we can fool around. A gloved finger slowly traces a path down my cheek, stops under my jaw, and tips my face up to look into his.

I love you, Anakin, I tell him.

His response is to shift me in his arms and set his lips against mine.

I think I can spare you a few minutes this morning, he decides.

***

Incoming transmission, precisely on time, and I know who has just arrived in system.

‘Admiral Piett,’ I greet the officer I had left in charge of my fleet.

‘My Lord,’ he answers immediately. ‘We are on a slow approach and should be in position in an hour.’

‘I am transferring your posting back to the Executor, which is acting as a command and control ship,’ I tell him. ‘Captain Kallic will brief you on the specifics. I shall speak with you, in person, later today.’

‘As you wish, my Lord,’ he accepts my orders, his hologram vanishing as our short conversation ends.

I will have a few minutes of peace before Jerjerrod expects me to be at another of his meetings, this time with the engineer in charge of the weapon system. Three days, I remind myself. We will have three days to work out any problems and perform the preliminary tests.

Activating the holo projector, I set it to view to the game with my wife, note her last move and consider my options. She won’t let me capture her knights and I will always defend my queen from any possible attacks. Be unpredictable, I decide. With a touch, I advance a pawn, just to see how she reacts.

Another game enters my mind, so I examine that board carefully, add a fortress in the shape of a Star Destroyer, and position it. Another piece, in the form of Piett and my fleet of six ships, is now in play.

Part 5

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